Sympathy and Empathy

Sympathy - feelings of pity or sorrow for someone else's misfortune. Empathy - the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. What would the world be like if we were all able to empathize with everyone? If we understood the feelings of someone who was depressed or grieving, someone going through a divorce, losing a child, or being angry at something or someone.... how could that change the world? I've heard that when you sympathize with someone you feel bad FOR them, when you empathize with someone you feel WITH them. Sometimes it's difficult to empathize with someone if you have not experienced that specific trial or challenge. That I understand. But even if everyone in the world could sympathize with others and feel sorry for their misfortune, well...it would be a much better world. I think some people really lack that ability to understand someone else's misfortune, or even try to. I think we are so busy judging people and solving their problems for them that we miss the piece of just being kind and compassionate. Does that mean we excuse, enable, and agree with every choice or situation that another person makes or finds themselves in? I don't think so. I know Robin William's suicide has generated A LOT of discussion in the world and theories, speculations, and assumptions on our part. It's generated some discord and  conflict. Even I got caught up in one of those discussions and finally realized that we all have different perceptions about different things . I get frustrated when I think people aren't being sympathetic to something or someone, even though that may be far from the case.  I remind myself every day "we judge ourselves by our intent, and others by their behavior."  Sometimes people's behavior, including mine, may be saying one thing, when their intent is very different.  It's hard to communicate with others and understand their thoughts, feelings, and experiences.  It's hard to understand others, and be understood.   The death of Robin Williams also generated a lot of awareness and compassion. If we have never been to the point of feeling so desperate that we consider suicide as the only way out, then we really can't empathize with him because we can't share his feelings. But we can certainly sympathize with him and his family. Or at least I hope we can.